Briley's first few hours of life

Once Briley and I had been taken up the the post-natal ward I encouraged Rob to head home for a bit of sleep & to be there when Madison woke up to tell her the big news.

Rob headed off on the 45 min journey home & I worried about him driving on no sleep & waited for his text to say he was home.

The midwives on the ward were very nice  & offered me tea & toast (best meal i've ever had lol) I was so hungry by now. I did a bit of tweeting in the early hours & took my first photo of us with me looking half decent ;-)

Later in the morning the midwife came she asked me what my plans were & I said i'd like to go home if I was allowed to. She told me I could go & have a shower & I had to remind her I had a catheter in due to the epidural. She took this out & waited for me to stand to check I was steady enough on my feet. She told me due to the catheter I had to produce a decent wee in order to be discharged.

She agreed to watch out for a sleeping Briley while I went for my shower.

Was SO nice to have a proper shower rather than a quick top & tail from a bowl, I did my wee but wasn't enough to satisfy the midwife so cue lots of drinking from me.

I had a chill out on the bed while Briley slept & clock watched till 10am, visiting time. Next thing i hear is ohhhh's and ahhhh's from the midwife's as my beautiful  daughter & Rob appear. Moo was clutching a big bunch of flowers so proudly & she ran over & gave them to me along with a massive hug :-) 

I asked her if she would like to meet her brother. She peered into the cot in awe. We sat her on the end of my bed and I handed her Briley <3

Seeing my baby girl with her newborn brother was amazing. She kept calling him her & insisted he was her sister but we kept calmy correcting her & assuring her he was a boy. She sat with me & read a magazine but started to get bored (understandably) & loud which I didn't think was fair to the other mums on the ward . 

During her visit I had managed a satisfactory wee so was just waiting to be discharged. I told Rob to take moo out for lunch & that i would text him when I could leave. They dissapeared off to McDonalds while i tucked into jacket potato. The peadiatrician came & checked Briley over & the midwife came & gave me my paper work & removed my cannula. 

Rob & Moo came back & Rob packed the car up while moo & i got Briley ready & in his car seat. We walked out of the hospital as a family of four, moo helping her dad carry the car seat with her new brother in. Moo & I fell asleep in the car on the way home so Rob had to wake us when we got back.

Robs parents were waiting for us to see their new grandson. We got him & the bags inside & Robs mum met her grandson for the first time. When his nappy needed changing Robs mum said 'I need to see this, I still can't believe he's a boy' ha ha. 

Robs sister & nephews came over to meet Briley & we had a few pics of all the kids together.

My mum, her partner & my brother came over to see Briley and i had my first pic at home taken with my son less than 24 hours after his birth <3 My mum promised there would be photo's of me as i'm usually the one taking them I miss out :-(

The next few days was a flurry of visitors and getting used to being a family of four.  Brileys first few hours & days were so different from Madison's and I feel so very blessed to have had my VBAC & to experiance a 'normal' birth & his first few days.

Briley at 6 months

Briley,

6 short months ago you came into my life after the natural delivery I craved. I can't remember life before you were here you have completed our family.

I was worried I couldn't & wouldn't love you as much as I love your sister I didn't want to share my love for her; but i needn't have worried. The moment you were placed on my chest my heart simply doubled in size.

We slipped effortlessly into a routine once we were home. A routine of eating, sleeping, pooing & cuddles lots of cuddles. You are Breastfed & it has been easier with you as I had already fed your sister I knew what I was doing & it seems as if you do too so we make a good team. Your a bit of a snacker so your feeds have never been very long but were always frequent. Since you started solids they are less frequent but you feed much longer. You like boob to fall asleep with but your equally happy to self settle which is fine by me. I love how you cling onto me as you feed & will really miss it when we decide to stop. 

Your sister has amazed me with how she has adjusted. She has her moments (mainly when your feeding) but mostly she loves to help me look after you & is the best big sister you could wish for. She spends time singing made up songs to you & bringing you toys. Watching you together makes my heart soar & i'm sure you'll be firm friends & argue like mad!!

Briley, you are so chilled out & easy going your smile lights up the room & people can't help but fall in love with you. We started weaning at 4 months as your weight gain started to tail off. You love your food & get so exited when you see your bowl & spoon. Your legs & arms go & you scream excitedly. You insist of putting your hands in your mouth while your eating making a massive mess but mummy doesn't mind (much lol)

You have mastered using your hands & now grab for everything & anything within your reach. Mainly hair & mostly mine & your sisters while we are blowing raspberries on your belly. Your very vocal & babble continuously while you are awake. You have an exited high pitched scream with we frequently get treated too. You now giggle when we tickle you or blow raspberries on your tummy or cheeks. 

You love cuddles & snuggle right on in & hold on tight you are so loving just like your sister & i hope it continues. Our new favorite game is kisses i pucker up & give you kisses & you tease & tilt your head back so i can kiss under your chin which then makes you giggle it's amazing how fast you learn little things. The recent thing is putting out your hands to me when i put my hands out to ask if you want picking up. It's so amazing to see you do things like that but also a reminder your growing up way to fast.

I try to give you lots of free time on your play matt as you love rolling about. You never stay on one spot now you have mastered rolling both ways. You have such strong legs you push yourself along on your forehead to reach things you want to play with. You love to be on your feet pulling & pushing on whoever is holding you till your upright. You will take steps while holding onto our hands & look so proud of yourself when you do.

Briley, I love you more than words can express. I cannot imagine my life without you now. You & your sister are my world you drive me crazy at times but I love you unconditionally.

Keep smiling, keep making me proud baby boy.

Love you to the sun and back

Mummy

xxx

Birth of Briley....part 2

So I had just been sent down to labour ward with 9% battery left on my phone read all about the start of my labour here... Briley's birth part one.

We were taken to the labour ward by one of the midwife's and shown to a room. It had the usual, a bed and it's own bathroom with all you'd expect from a birthing room. We were asked if we wanted anything to eat so we ended up with luke warm fish and chips, or the last supper as I like to call it as was my last meal before Briley arrived.

We finished eating and the midwife came back and advised us to go into Salisbury town for an hour or two and have a good walk about to get my contractions coming on faster and a bit more regular. I saw this as my oppertunity to get a phone charger and call my mum to make arrangements for Madison.

We googled for the nearest Argos and headed there to get the much needed phone charger :-)
I called my mum and explained what was happening, Robs mum was also with her which was great as they were both to play a part in caring for Madison. I wanted my mum with me once things got going so Robs mum stayed with Madison while my mum went home to rest up, eat and pack a bag ready for when/if i called wanting her to come to the hospital (45 mins away!)

Rob and I headed for the garage to stock up on some snacks and some drinks to get us through the next few hours as although we packed my hospital bag 'just in case' we hadn't packed my usual labour goody bag. We parked up in the garage and went in all the while stopping for contractions. I was having a particular strong one clung to Robs arm in the garage when a random guy asked if all was ok and if he could help. I looked up as Rob said 'she's in labour' the mans face was a picture he stumbled over his words not knowing what to say, his reply was 'Oh um Oh I'm just gonna go now then. Good Luck' ha ha ha made me & Rob chuckle. We went to pay and saw the guy again who was now with his wife they both smiled and wished us luck.

We headed for a local park after this and had a walk around which really did start to kick off the contractions and get them into a more regular pattern. After an hour we decided to head back to the hospital and see what the next plan of action was. We went back to the room were had first been shown into and plugged in my phone to charge (very important ) We kept timing my contractions but were left for almost two hours with no one coming to check in on us. As contractions were getting much more painful Rob went to find someone to check on me.   A midwife came and spoke to me wanting to know how far apart contractions were etc. She hadn't had time to read my notes but we decided I would try and get in a bath to try and relax me and help with contractions. She started to run the bath but the water wasn't getting hot enough so she went off to see if she could find another room with hotter water. She came back 5 mins later and took us into another (much bigger) room where she had started to run a bath.

I stripped off and climbed in; it felt like such a relief to have the warm water over my bump and I really did relax and feel in control which was a very nice feeling after Madison's birth where I felt totally out of control. I was happy contracting in the bath for a good hour maybe more. In that time I had sent Rob off to get my bag out of the van and the midwife came in and checked on me just to see I was happy and coping ok. When a different midwife came into check on me a bit later I decided to get out of the water and asked to be checked as I wanted to know how far along (if at all) I was. I got out of the bath and got dry and into a hospital gown, not sure why I didn't get into my own clothes. I also asked Rob to phone my mum to come to the hospital as I felt things were starting to 'kick off'.

The midwife examined me and I was 3 cm, she told me not to be dis-heartened to which I replied 'I'm extatic, I was stuck at 1-2 cm for three days with my first 3 cm is amazing' lol

I wanted to discuss pain relief like pethadine or similar but contractions had ramped up and I opted for gas and air as couldn't talk through contractions any longer. The midwifes changed shift and my new midwife and a student midwife introduced themselves and busied about checking my BP etc and strapping me to a monitor which I wore throughout my labour; due to the problems with Madison's heart rate in my previous labour.

They had trouble picking up baby's heart rate so kept making me move position to try and help. This made me panic as I thought back to Madison's birth but my midwife was fab and told me although it was dipping all other signs were fine and she was not concerned.

At this point contractions were really strong and I was starting to loose control as the gas and air began not to be as effective in taking the edge off. I asked in the lovely 'drunk' state of gas and air for an epidural which to my mind seemed to be ignored. I then began asking Rob where my mum was as she hadn't arrived yet so he texted her and she said she was nearly there. I could see in Robs face he was starting to panic as I was in pain and screaming for the epidural. The midwife was trying to calm me down and get me to concentrate on using the gas and air to get me through contractions. At this point my mum walked in and dropped her bags as I saw her I totally lost control.

Rob says I  was doing fine until I saw my mum & then I lost it. It is true I could see him panicking so I kept it together like I always do to make him feel less uncomfortable. the minute my mum was there to care for him and me I was free to loose it and not worry about Rob.

My mum says my eyes were flashing with anger as I told her I wanted and epidural but I was being ignored. my mum tried her best to help me relax and get back in control. I had a totally lucid moment when I turned to Rob and ordered him to find out how Madison was. He used this time to step out of the room ad make a call to his mum to find out how Madison was, update his mum on my progress and regain his composure.

My mum was then told I was next on the list but the anesthetist was stuck in A&E at the moment. I'm usually very polite and mild mannered around people I don't know and my mum but at this point a contraction hit and a string of very harsh expletives came out of my mouth which made my mum wince.

What I am told was 2 hours later (!!!!!!) the anesthetist walks through the door in all his glory, I have never been so pleased to see someone with a big needle (i'm needle phobic) he explained the procedure to me all the while having to stop for my contractions. He told me to sit very very still and to under no circumstances move. At this very point the monitor went quiet ad I could't hear baby's heartbeat so I sat bolt upright to be screamed at 'Don't move!' by the anesthetist. He finished what he was doing with me sobbing' I'm so sorry, I couldn't hear the baby, I'm sorry I couldn't hear it and thought of Madison's birth. I'm so sorry' my mum & Rob hugged me and mum told me 'This isn't Madison's birth, stop thinking it is and try to relax'.

The poor anesthetist said don't worry about it but that I moved just as he was putting the needle in which is the most crucial part. He connected the epidural and the warm feeling washed over me as the pain slowly dissapeared. A-mazing feeling.

Just after the epidural, happy face lol

After the epidural when I was back to my normal self  I apologised for my behaviour early on and my language I felt so bad. They said they were used to it and had seen much worse :-/

The midwife checked my BP etc again and decided to examine me and see if she could break my waters. I was 7 cm and my waters were broken. The next few hours were quite un-eventful. They attached a wire to the baby's head to better monitor babies heart rate which kept dipping so I was moved positions from my back to my side quite a bit. They weren't picking up my contractions on the monitor either so kept adjusting it.  

Rob and I started discussing names when we decided we didn't like our chosen girls name which was 'Alana' so cue panic as we tried to agree on another one with my mum and the midwives help. We decided in the end if we had a girl we would discuss is after the birth as we couldn't agree on a name we both liked.

Throughout my labour other midwifes came into check on the babies trace 'new eyes' they called it. I loved the reassurance this gave me and think all maternity units/wards should do the same (they didn't with M's birth!)

Contractions started to get stronger again and epidural had run out so I was starting to feel them again I was given gas and air while the midwife went to get more epidural. This was given and the contractions began to slowly stop hurting again. The midwife asked if she could examine me again which was fine, as she did she said 'Oh' my mum asked what that was for and she said she could feel an ear. Nobody thought anything of this as she was so calm about everything (she had actually felt the cord around babies neck). She said I was 10cm and ready to push but that she wanted her colleague to have a look at the trace as baby's heartbeat was playing up again.

She left the room and returned with the consultant. She looked at the trace and said this baby needs to come out now if by the time I come back baby is not out i'm getting my scissors out. We all laughed and the bed was stripped down and stirrups put on and I started to push. As epidural had only just been administered again I needed to be told when to push. I gave a few good pushes the started to be sick which was not nice or attractive but really helped push baby down so they could see the head. 

The consultant returned and said I needed help with forceps and was I ok with that. I agreed and they started setting up 'down there'. Two more midwifes came in to help which again we thought nothing of as they were all so calm. The consultant said as baby was so far down after me being sick she needed to use a suction cap only but I would still need a small cut. This was done and the suction cap applied with me feeling nothing due to the epidural. I was told when to push and after one or two pushes the consultant said 'we have a head, and yes cord round neck just as we thought' We had known nothing about this as they were all so calm and professional the cord was released from round baby's neck and with the next push baby literally popped out into the consultants hands. I had felt nothing, no head crowning nothing but I had my VBAC and was so proud of myself.

My baby was placed immediately onto my chest screaming like a good-un. It was wrapped in towels and was being given a good rub. I told Rob to get the camera and this is one of the first pics before we even knew our babies sex.

Our baby screamed and screamed and I just smiled I was so happy, I'd done it!! The midwife asked if I knew what we had got. I parted the towels to see.........A WINKY!!! I could not believe it; there was a moment's silence as I turned to Rob and said 'It's a boy!' he looked totally stunned ad said 'no way' lol  my mum smiled and said 'oh my god'. 

The consultant was busy down the other end with the after birth and sewing me back up. I was caught by my mum a bit later looking again just checking it was a boy lol.  Everything was cleaned up really quickly and everyone left the room so me, Ron and my mum could meet my son properly and in private. I was told to buzz when I was ready to have him weighed etc. I felt un-rushed it was lovely. I put him to the breast and he fed like a pro :-)

We made phone calls to those important people and I set a few texts of my own to some twitter buddies and friends. It was so nice to be there and hear people's responses and I never got to do that after Madison's birth.

After Madison's Birth looking rough lol

After Briley's birth such a difference to after Madison's

After a hour or so we buzzed and they came back to weigh Briley and measure his length and head etc. The student midwife did all of this under the senior midwife's guidence. He was given his vitamin K injection and a little bath to de-gunk him. We were left again and we said our goodbyes to my mum too so Rob and I could sit and be with our new son. I dozed while Rob sat ad had cuddles with his boy. Four lovely, un-rushed hours after his birth I was taken up to the post-natel ward and Rob went home to see our girl and tell her she has a new brother!!

The next blog post will be about my first few hours with my newborn son, my children's first meeting and our first few hours at home as a family of four.

I will leave you with a picture of a newborn Briley James Antony Carter. Born on 26th January 2013 at 2.32 am weighing in at 7 lb 7 oz.

The Birth of Briley James Antony Carter

First a bit of background about my pregnancy.

If you have read Madison's birth story you will know she was 8 days late and encouraged by a sweep and ended in an emergency Cesarean Section. Baby number two was to be an attempted VBAC (vaginal birth after Cesarean) I had arranged to transfer my care to a different hospital to the one Madison was born in and was hoping for a 'normal' birth.

During the last few weeks of pregnancy number two I was being monitored for pre-eclampsia due too high blood pressure and protein in my urine. This along with the pain I now know is gall stones resulted in trips to our local maternity unit for monitoring.  I had two sets of notes that needed to be filled in one for my home area and one for the hospital I transferred my care too. Only the local notes were being filled in by my midwife and not both as was required. I had been photocopying these to add to my chosen hospital's notes. 

My care near the end of my pregnancy was appalling with me not being monitored closely enough. I had been sent to the maternity unit to be monitored a second time then my midwife didn't want to see me for three weeks. I had no consultant appointment so no plans for if I went overdue. My midwife told me I had the arrange the consultant appointmet myself. When I called the hospital I was told I couldn't do it as I needed to be reffered by my midwife who was by this point unavailable (found out after she had gone on holiday & that is why she wasn't seeing me or arranging a consultant app for me!) this resulted in me becoming very emotional and resulted in my mum calling the midwife unit to complain and ask for further advice and help. I was eventually seen twice more by a lovely midwife who monitored me and arranged the much needed consultant appointment my named midwife had refused to arrange for me!!

25th January 2013 (2 days overdue)

Looked at the clock....4.46 am wide awake suddenly with bad period like pains low in bump. Breathe through a couple not really regular.

Get up check on Moo, pee, take a couple of paracetamol and back to bed to play on my phone.  Having more tightening's but breathing through them. Got consultant app at Salisbury today anyway so will see what they say.

The above was what I jotted down on the 'notes' app on my phone. Little did I know that was the beginning of a very eventful day. 

I managed to breathe through the very irregular pains I was having. Madison woke and came into our bed and wanted me to read her a story which I tried to do in - between contractions. Tried to wake Rob up to fill him in on what was happening but he was having none of it and stayed asleep till a bit later on.  I managed to get Madison and I up and dressed and sorted breakfast. I remember having the desire to hoover the downstairs which I did. That made my contractions ramp up in intensity.

My mum was due to come and collect Madison for the day. This was so that Rob and I could go and see the consultant at Salisbury hospital to discuss eviction plans if our baby decided not to come by itself. My mum arrived and I kissed Madison goodbye as I would normally and told her we would be seeing her later. I told my mum I was having 'pains' but honestly thought nothing much of it at that point as they were so irregular. Mum suggested that we take my hospital bag just in case.

Rob and I bundled into his works van (hospital bag in hand) it is a 40 min drive to the hospital from our house ad is quite a pleasant drive. Rob and I chatted and I continued to contract irregularly on the drive there. We arrived with a few minutes to spare until  my appointment but there was no parking spaces outside the Maternity unit. We did a few rounds of the car park and eventually Rob dropped me off to go and check in at reception while he parked up.

In the waiting room I continued to contract irregularly, and my phone battery was slowly getting very low. They were running very behind so Rob popped out once to get food and once to add a new ticket to the van as our original one had run out. After almost 2 hours waiting we were called through.  The midwife noticed I was contracting as I had to stop on one occasion she said ' have you been quietly going into labour in the waiting room' she asked me to give a urine sample which tested positive for protein, she took my blood pressure which was also high.

The midwife asked why my notes had not been filled in so I explained and handed over my other set of notes. She aplogised for leaving us waiting so long and said if they had bee properly informed of my high blood pressure etc by my midwife they wouldn't have left me in the waiting room so long. She said that she would be making a complaint about the care I had received etc as she was not happy. She went away to tell my consultant her findings while Rob and I waited. By this point my phone battery was at 20% and dissapearing fast.

My consultant entered the room and asked me about my contractions. He said due to the fact I was overdue, had protein in my urine, high blood pressure and was contracting he wanted to do an internal examination and see what was going on. I hopped up on the bed as the consultant searched for gloves, they had medium and small in the room but he wanted large......cue panicking from me (he was doing an internal remember lol). The consultant did and internal and confirmed I was fully effaced and he then continued to do a very very effective sweep with me gripping vice like onto his nurse's hand. 

I cleaned up, re-dressed and re-grouped while he made some notes in my file. I sat back down next to Rob and the consultant turned and said 'I am sending you over the the labour ward, you will not be going home now until you have had your baby' he jotted down some more in my notes, said he hoped all goes well and that he wouldn't be seeing me (i.e. I get my VBAC) and he left.

Que silence and then Rob turns to me and says 'I'm not ready' ha ha ha I looked at him and said 'and you think I am?!!!' Quick text to my mum explaining whats happening and telling her i'll call in a bit and a text to @neljones who i'd been texting throughout the morning. Nel then tweeted ''SO @Kellit1085's baby will be coming today or tomorrow! She's gone down to labour ward to get contractions started! But only has 9% batt!'

PART TWO COMING SOON!...........

Due Date......

It's 11:02pm so just under an hour till the big 'DUE DATE' I really wish they gave you a 'Due Week' because everyone; myself included is fixed on this one date like suddenly at 1 min past midnight your going to arrive.

It doesn't happen like that. It happens when you & my body decide it will or when your evicted by other means for over staying your welcome ;-) Even now, even with you being my second baby & knowing it doesn't work like that i'm waiting like a ticking time bomb for something to happen.

I'm already feeling defensive & annoyed at the calls & messages i'll receive from well meaning family & friends wanting to know whats happening and the inevitable 'you not had that baby yet' comments that drive me insane. I've decided they will be met with a sarcastic response or ignored completely (depending who it is perhaps in some cases ;-).

Part of me would love to go into labour myself with no sweep etc perhaps more chance of the holy grail that is a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean section)

The other part of me would like to be induced so I can plan childcare for Madison & feel more at ease about leaving her. To also know that this time I will be properly monitored, properly medicated (pain relief wise ;-) & perhaps have the birth I imagined for my first pregnancy.

For now i'm taking each day as it comes. I have the consultant Friday (40+2) so can discuss next steps etc & hopefully feel a bit more in control & ready to be a family of 4.

Watch this space, hopefully I can try & tweet some of my labour etc but you will know when Baby Carter has entered the world!!

Wish me luck ;-) xx

Guessing Game

So It's now 2013 and 23 days till my due date with baby No2 :-/ Eeeeeek.

I've got a box at home full off predictions from friends & family on the date my baby will arrive, it's gender & it's weight. I thought it might be a bit of fun to see what you twitter folks think.

Theres no prize to speak of except the pride of getting all or some of it correct lol ;-)


Here's a few bit's of info to help with your guesses...........

Madison was 8 days late & labour started with a stretch & sweep on day 6 of being overdue.

Madison weighed in at 7Ilb 5oz.

I am carrying higher this pregnancy than with Madison.

Sickness stopped slightly sooner & was about the same as when I was pregnant with Madison.

No cravings as such this pregnancy.

Much more active baby this time from what i remember with Madison.

This is just a bit of fun, please leave your guesses as comments & i'll blog details after the new arrival is here.

I've added the most recent photo of me now next to one of me pregnant with Madison. This bump comes & goes daily rolling to front & then back again so it's the best picture i've got ;-)

Control Freak or Organised?!

With Christmas approaching very fast my thought's are naturally turning to thoughts of labour and birth of baby Carter Mk2 who is due on 23rd January 2013. I'm hoping for slightly early & not another late baby ;-)

My main thoughts are centered around my daughter, Madison. She is my world, THE MOST important person in my life.

My labour & birth with Madison was long. I made two late night visits to hospital over two days of contractions, to be turned away. The third day saw me admitted late at night followed by emergency c-section (birth story on the blog).

Now the reason I bring this up is because this time around I have Madison. I cannot just pop to the hospital to be checked out & then be sent away because I will have to call my mum or Robs mum to come & have Madison while we do this. The thought of messing people about in the middle if the night scares me :-/ the thought of Madison seeing me in distress scares me :-/ I have also transferred my care to a hospital a bit further away so the traveling time is increased also!

I want Madison to be prepared to wake up one morning without me or her dad there but her nanny or granny. I've tried explaining this to her & she seems to understand but I guess I won't know if she fully understands until it happens.

I want Madison to be cared for at our house in familiar surroundings. If i am away for more than one night I want her to sleep at home in her own bed with the routine she knows.

If I have to stay in after baby is born I want Rob to be home to do bedtime with her.

I want Rob to tell her if she has a brother or sister!

I want her to be the first visitor for the baby!

Theres lots I 'WANT' for her & for me; to feel secure & happy so I can concentrate on delivering baby 2 & not worrying about how Madison is & where she is! I know there are some very strong characters in Robs family who like to think they know best!!! so I have written all my thoughts & wants down & made sure Rob is clear & agrees on them all so hopefully us being united in these things will make sure they happen.

Ultimately i know when it all kicks off & i'm in labour i won't have chance to worry about Madison but I want to be as relaxed as possible before hand & know those people I call on to help with Madison etc know my expectations.

I'm pretty sure I come across as a major control freak but I want my daughter to feel safe & secure at the start of what may be a very tough journey for her......becoming a big sister!!!